Why am I so ill now?

Because I am suffering from a somatic disorder where I perpetuate my own beliefs about illness
Because I took 10 years’ of antibiotics when I was young
Because I am depressed
Because I have anxiety disorder
Because I internalised my parents fighting, manufacturing illness
Because I have an poorly-understood organic disease called CFS/M.E.
Because I am on too many drugs for anxiety and sleeplessness
Because God is punishing me
Because I am having codeine withdrawal
Because the universe likes to experiment on people
Because the medical diet I am on is making me iller
Because I am perpetuating my own anxiety as illness myth
Because I am suffering from chronic lack of stage four sleep
Because I have subconscious reasons to gain from remaining ill
Because I was bitten by a tick and have unrecognised Lyme disease
Because I grew up transgendered, and my unhappiness results in physical symptoms
Because I am self-pitying
Because I have an undetected illness such as MS
Because I am chronically lonely through lack of social interaction
Because my anxiety about my hearing loss has driven me to self-isolation
Because I am a weak person
Because I have hidden mercury poisoning
Because some people are not built to survive, and current society prolongs their existence artificially
Because I have a brain tumour
Because I lack courage
Because I am a bad person, and am being paid back for it
Because I have chronic candida which is affecting my whole immune system
Because I have no courage to lift myself out of this state
Because I have hidden severe allergies
Because my unhappy childhood set my brain and body on a course of self-hurt
Because I have an as-yet misunderstood immune system dysfunction
Because I am a scientific experiment in a simulated world
Because some things are supposed to be
Because I won’t get out of bed, rather than can’t
Because my mother passed on a polio-type illness she contracted to me via the womb
Because there are no reasons, and the universe is unkind and unknowing
Because I sleep outside my natural circadian rhythm of daylight and nighttime
Because I deserve it
Because I ask questions like this, while so many are so much iller, more unhappy, more anxious